Recently, a friend and I leaned against my kitchen counter, watching our children play in the backyard. As we sipped coffee we chatted about a young couple in our church that is in the process of adopting two children. We reminisced about the time when we were in their shoes, recalling how little we truly knew and understood about the road that lay ahead. My friend and I agreed — we wished we could share all we have learned since that time about adopting children from “hard places.” We wished that someone had done the same for us.
As we talked, I realized that much of what we have learned along the way might be helpful to more than just this couple. They are good lessons and timely reminders for all of us who are on the adoption journey, no matter how far along.
Children from hard places have unique histories and needs. As a result, parents of these children need to learn how to love and parent them well. This requires that parents not only learn strategies that will be effective in helping them heal, but they will also need to ‘un-learn’ previous ways of parenting — whether those be parenting strategies that were successful with their biological children, ways that they themselves were parented or parenting approaches that others in their church or circle of friends are using.
In this brief video, Dr. Purvis explains the need for parents to focus specifically on the child that God has called them to love and care for, and to parent that child in a way that can bring hope, healing and joy.
Recently Dr. Karyn Purvis was interviewed on the FamilyLife Today radio program. During this three part interview, Dr. Purvis discusses the characteristics of children from hard places, the importance of parents having realistic expectations and tools and strategies that can help parents effectively correct behaviors and develop strong and lasting connections with their children. You can listen to each of these interviews below or purchase a single CD containing all three interviews from FamilyLife.
Listen as Dr. Purvis talks about the realities for children from hard places and encourages parents to “count the cost”:
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Listen as Dr. Purvis talks about the importance of parents having realistic expectations as they begin and travel the adoption or foster care journey:
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Listen as Dr. Purvis offers tools and strategies for parents to help them connect with their children to help them heal and become all that God intends:
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For many, the adoption process begins by surveying agency information, evaluating financial considerations and tackling mountains of paperwork, all while working through a complex array of questions, doubts and even fears. One important, but often overlooked, aspect is the need to engage the adoption journey from the “inside out” – through ongoing, honest self-reflection and self-evaluation.
Show Hope and Empowered To Connect are partnering to present the Empowered To Connect Conference on September 10 & 11, 2010, in Nashville, Tennessee. This two day conference will feature two tracks with sessions and workshops led by Dr. Karyn Purvis and Michael & Amy Monroe. All participants are highly encouraged to attend sessions on both days, and professionals will be eligible to receive CEU credit for their participation in the conference.
Parents often focus much of their attention on obtaining the right skills and strategies to effectively deal with misbehavior — and this is for good reason. All parents of children from hard places need to understand how to address misbehavior in ways that correct while still connecting. But parents also need to understand the importance of setting their child up to succeed.
In this brief video, Dr. Purvis explains why it is important for parents to set thier child up to succeed, and she talks about some practical ways parents can begin to do that.
Created To Connect: A Christian’s Guide to The Connected Child is a study guide created by Dr. Karyn Purvis and Michael & Amy Monroe to help illuminate the biblical principles that serve as the foundation for the philosophy and the interventions detailed in Dr. Purvis’ book, The Connected Child. This study guide is designed to help adoptive and foster parents better understand how to build strong and lasting connections with their children, and is ideal for use in small groups as well as by individuals or couples.
This new 16 video series (developed in partnership with the TCU Institute of Child Development) offers seven insights and seven gifts that are highly relevant for all parents who are parenting or considering adopting or fostering children from hard places. ETC is also developing a discussion guide for this video series, which will be available in May 2010.
Dr. Karyn Purvis introduces Empowered To Connect’s Insights & Gifts video series. This 16 video series focuses on seven insights and seven gifts for parents who adopt or foster children from hard places.
Adoption Learning Partners recently conducted a webinar entitled Parenting Children from Haiti and Other “Hard Places” featuring Dr. Karyn Purvis. ALP has graciously allowed us to post a link to the webinar here.
During this webinar Dr. Purvis addresses important questions and issues such as: who is a child from hard places; how to encourage the development of trust and secure attachment; effective ways to correct behavior; how to handle transitions; and many more.
Click here to launch the audio and slide presentation for the webinar. (Note: There were some minor technical issues during the audio recording. We apologize for the distractions during the presentation.)