Archive for “Motivations and Expectations”
By: Michael Monroe
Tuesday, March 5, 2013
Parents can often feel pressure to respond to each of their children with ‘sameness’ instead of true ‘fairness’ based on individual needs and development. Watch as Michael Monroe offers helpful insights about the important question of ‘fairness’ and encourages parents to focus on meeting the unique needs of each child in order to help their children heal and grow.
Tags: 10 Common Questions Series, Behavioral Challenges, Giving Voice, Motivations and Expectations, Talking with Childen
Posted in Video |
By: Michael Monroe
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
People who make things look easy really get on my nerves. You know who I’m talking about. Ever watched one of those cooking shows on TV? You see them making some recipe in 10 easy steps and it always comes out looking hot, beautiful, and delicious. So you try it at home and all you end up with is a giant mess of something ugly and inedible. Or maybe you’ve watched one of those home improvement shows where the host can build, repair, or decorate just about anything and it turns out great, all on a shoestring budget. So in a fit of inspiration you make a trip to Home Depot, spend twice as much as you wanted to, come home and four hours later all your spouse can say is “maybe we can call someone to come fix it tomorrow.” Why does it seem to be so easy for some people? Why are so many things in life easier said than done?
Tags: Behavioral Challenges, Being Fully Present, Connecting While Correcting, Count the Cost, Investment Model of Parenting, Motivations and Expectations
Posted in Articles |
By: Michael Monroe
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
“Who are you?” I remember thinking this unthinkable thought as I looked into the face of my young son only a few years into our life together as an adoptive family. He did not share my DNA but he was every bit ‘mine.’ Yet while we were both made in the image of the same God, I was becoming aware that we were two very different reflections.
In that moment I began to be confronted by much of what I had brought into the journey of adoptive parenting – most significantly my expectations about my child and how this journey would unfold. In reality I hardly knew my son, still that did not stop me from creating expectations about the things he would like and how he would act and think. On top of that, I expected that the adoption path God had led us down would be relatively easy and straightforward once we were home. I convinced myself that adoption was little more than a historical fact of how we came to be, rather than an ongoing reality of the journey that lay ahead.
Tags: Adoption Preparation, Being Fully Present, Compassion, Especially for Dads, Motivations and Expectations
Posted in Articles |
By: Dr. Karyn Purvis
Thursday, October 18, 2012
Parents often struggle to blend the parenting approach they used before they adopted with the trust-based parenting approach they are now using to meet the unique needs of a child from a hard place.
Watch as Dr. Karyn Purvis explains how parents can effectively meet the needs of all of their children — biological, adopted, foster — by using a parenting approach that focuses on building trust. In addition, Dr. Purvis offers valuable insight to help parents explain changes in their parenting approach to their older biological child, and encourages parents to give these children a voice as the family welcomes new children through adoption and embraces their needs.
Tags: 10 Common Questions Series, Adoption Preparation, Giving Voice, Investment Model of Parenting, Motivations and Expectations, Older Children, Talking with Childen
Posted in Video |
By: Dr. Karyn Purvis
Wednesday, October 3, 2012
As a result of their early life experiences, children from hard places often miss out on some of the key development that is essential in helping them learn to trust and grow relationally. As a result of their unique histories and needs, these children need parents that are willing to utilize the unique approach of trust-based parenting to help them heal and grow.
Watch as Dr. Karyn Purvis encourages adoptive and foster parents to embrace trust-based parenting as the “new normal” that God has called them to as an essential part of the journey.
Tags: 10 Common Questions Series, Adoption Preparation, Balance of Nurture & Structure, Count the Cost, Investment Model of Parenting, Motivations and Expectations
Posted in Video |
By: Tona Ottinger
Monday, September 10, 2012
As adoptive parents walking a journey of healing with our children, we have an opportunity to enter into their world with empathy and compassion in a way that points them to the hope of the Savior. God has given us the divine honor of being mom or dad. We have the privilege of nurturing our children’s hopes and dreams, giving them goodnight kisses, wiping away their tears, teaching them as they grow and mature, and being the ones they look to for acceptance, security, and love. Parenting is holy ground, and we are allowed a front row seat as we watch their stories unfold and God does His work in and through them.
But as amazing and wonderful as being a parent can be, it can also be exhausting and at times terrifying.
Tags: Devotionals, Motivations and Expectations
Posted in Articles |
By: Michael Monroe
Monday, September 3, 2012
Everyone loves a story with a happy ending. It’s the stuff that best-selling books and box office hits are made of. Happy endings lift our spirits and inspire us to dream. They get us started, keep us going, and give us reason to believe.
When families adopt they too dream of living out a story with a happy ending. And well they should. After all, adoption is full of joys and blessings, and for many these experiences are the hallmarks of the journey itself.
But there’s just one problem when it comes to our enchantment with happy endings – they don’t always happen. Not in life and certainly not in adoption.
Tags: Count the Cost, Devotionals, Motivations and Expectations
Posted in Articles |
By: Lisa Qualls
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
When I became a mother, I wanted summer days to be relaxed and fun. With a larger family, there was more work to be done, so my children had significant chores, and yard work to do, but there was still plenty of time for play. Stacks of books to read, afternoons at the local pool, and sleeping out in the yard were foundations to our days.
This summer my desk is stacked with lists of activities, charts for chores, camp registration forms, and appointment reminders. As I’ve been working on plans for this summer, I recognize how differently I approach summer as the mother of children from “hard places.”
Tags: Balance of Nurture & Structure, Being Fully Present, Count the Cost, Investment Model of Parenting, Motivations and Expectations, Older Children, Sensory Processing
Posted in Articles |
By: Amy Monroe, Michael Monroe
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
It is critically important for parents to remain focused on what it means to be successful as they navigate the adoption or foster care journey. Watch as Amy & Michael Monroe share their insights about how to measure success on this journey.
Tags: Behavioral Challenges, Motivations and Expectations
Posted in Video |
By: Lisa Qualls
Thursday, April 19, 2012
You know those people who always seem to have it all together? They look great, their children are well behaved and dressed in darling outfits, their homes are decorated and lovely, and life seems to be going along swimmingly? I used to aspire to be like that, but that doesn’t seem to be God’s plan for me. It’s not that I’m admitting defeat or saying that I’m giving up on a tidy life, rather I am accepting that our path is messy.
When we love people, we invite their brokenness and mess into our lives. Mess is inconvenient; it takes our time, energy, and sometimes money to make it better. Despite our efforts, the mess cannot always be fully contained. It spills over and touches the people who dare to stand near.
Tags: Adoption Preparation, Being Fully Present, Count the Cost, Motivations and Expectations
Posted in Articles |