Behavioral Challenges

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When Your Child Pushes You Away

When most children get hurt or become afraid, they go to a parent. After all, parents are the ones who protect children and keep them safe from danger. They are the ones who comfort children when they are afraid. For these children it’s a simple equation: mom and dad are safe and I can trust them to help me so I will go to them.

But things aren’t always that simple for children with histories of early harm such as trauma, abuse, neglect, or relinquishment. Their life experiences impact them in any number of important ways, often making them prone to prolonged states of fear and a limited ability to trust. Instead of going to their parents for help or comfort, these children often run from them, push them away, or shut them out.

By Michael Monroe, ago

Real Hope in the Balance

The challenges, problems and pain that our children face are real, and as a result, they affect us as parents as well. These challenges impact the whole child; and therefore, we must be willing to engage and embrace our children (and ourselves!) holistically. At the same time, we must always remember there are no quick fixes—merely changing behaviors will not accomplish what is needed. Our goal must be nothing less than healing for the whole child. Much like our own journey of spiritual healing and maturity, the healing we desire for our children will be a process, and it must be anchored by hope—real hope.

By Michael Monroe, ago

How Do I Find the Right Professional To Help Us?

Adoptive and foster parents often need to look to professionals to help them and their child. But how do parents know which professionals to turn to?

Watch as Dr. Karyn Purvis and Michael Monroe offer practical insight about how parents should view the role of professionals and which criterion they should use in selecting the right professional to come alongside them in order to help bring about healing for their child.

By Michael Monroe, ago

Why Won’t My Child Act His Age?

In response to meltdowns, emotional outbursts, extreme neediness, and many other behavioral challenges, adoptive and foster parents are often left asking: “why won’t my child act his or her age?”

Watch as Dr. Karyn Purvis and Michael Monroe address this important question, offering insight about the needs of adoptive and foster children and how parents can effectively meet those needs to build trust and develop a stronger connection.

By Dr. Karyn Purvis, ago

The Importance of Neuro – transmitters

Neurotransmitters are the chemical messengers that help our bodies think, feel and move. However, the levels of key neurotransitters in many children from hard places are often too high, too low and/or out of balance. In this brief video, Dr. Karyn Purvis explains the importance of neurotransmitters, both in terms of helping parents gain new insight and compassion for their children and also for understanding how they might begin to address this important issue.

By JD Wilson, ago

Keys to an Effective Time-In With Your Child

Time-in (as opposed to time-out) is an important strategy to help parents learn to “connect while correcting” with their children.

When using the time-in strategy it’s critical to remember that time-in is not intended to punish your child. Instead, time-in is designed to help your child calm and regulate so that he can express his needs (or wants) appropriately. Also, be sure not to jump the gun and resort to time-in when another, lower level strategy (such as playful engagement or choices) might address the behavior more effectively.

But there are times when a time-in is precisely the strategy that is called for. So here are eight keys to help you implement an effective time-in with your child.

By Michael Monroe, ago

Understanding Sensory Processing

Sensory processing is an important topic for anyone who loves and cares for a child from a hard place. Beacuse of their histories, children from hard places often experience altered brain development which impacts the way in which they process sensory data.

In this brief video, Dr. Karyn Purvis explains what sensory processing is and why an understanding of it is vital for adoptive and foster parents.

By Dr. Karyn Purvis, ago